During the next few weeks I am taking a small step back from writing here on CHK while I cuddle with my new little one and learn to adjust to life with 3 little ones. During that time I wanted to open up my blog to some other writers to share different stories and messages with you.
Today I’m pleased to introduce you to Wynter. She is sharing a heart filled post on the sacrifice of motherhood. Sometimes motherhood can mean we make choices that aren’t always popular or are questioned by others, but we need to remember that they are OUR choices and only we know what’s best for our family.
Guest Post by Wynter from Made to Mother
It would be so easy to give up. To throw in this towel of motherhood and let someone else fight my domestic wife and mommy battles.
The world tells me that I am not enough if I am just a mom. That I could be more productive and more valuable to society if I spent my time elsewhere. They say that my kids will not be educationally prepared or socialized enough if I homeschool them. That there will always be someone more competent to give them the tools they need to grow up into well-adjusted, capable adults. They tell me that I will never be good enough, smart enough, eloquent enough, focused enough. So why do I even bother?
Sometimes I am so close to believing them.
It would be so easy to quit this simple life I lead. Put my kids in daycare, preschool and all-day kindergarten, where the hands that hold and the voices that teach are more educated, more equipped and better qualified to take care of my kids. It would be the worldly-wise thing to spend my days on Facebook or doing whatever I want with my time. I could get a job outside the home and provide another paycheck to pay for private school, a larger home, a nanny or housekeeping service and all the toys and stuff we “need” to be happy.
But I don’t.I buckle down for the task. I don’t take the easy road; I take the road less traveled.
The bumpy, dirty and exhausting highway of stay-at-home-wife, mother and homeschool educator. I am the first one up in my house, Bible open and on my knees, covering our home, family and day in prayer. Then, after a full day of driving to playdates, teaching homeschool, preparing meals, doing housework and playing with my kids, I work late into the evening, planning preschool lessons for the next day, putting away supper leftovers, washing the dishes still left on the table and picking up toys or folding laundry.
I don’t always get time to myself during the day, to sit down and eat a hot meal, or take an uninterrupted hot shower, let alone read a book, lie down or talk on the phone to a friend without someone little crying, whining or tattling. I sometimes live off of the leftovers from my kids’ plates; the bread crusts and apple peals that are discarded.
The only time I get to write, read or have an adult conversation or watch a grown-up movie with my husband in complete silence is after 9:30 or 10 at night when our three little ones have finally fallen asleep, and I’ve finished my chores and lesson plans for the day. But often by that time, I am so exhausted that all I want to do is crawl into bed or lie on the couch and watch some mindless television.
It’s not easy. It’s not always fun. But I do it anyway.
Because every moment I spend with my kids is precious, needed and they are hungry for it. They live for mommy to play with them, read to them, hold them, listen to them and show them there is NOTHING more important to me in this life than them!
From society’s viewpoint I may not be the smartest or most experienced stay-at-home caregiver. I read books on how to understand my children better, speak to them more patiently and nurture their growing souls extra tenderly. I make a lot of mistakes and have to ask for their forgiveness as much as I expect them to say they are sorry for their disobedience.
But there is no one that will love my kids more than I do.
The educational powers that be tell me that because I don’t have a teaching degree, homeschooling is putting them at risk for falling behind or affecting their ability to learn. I have to search daily on Pinterest and education sites for free crafts, projects and worksheets to do with them, but they are smart, they are “getting it” and I still believe I can teach my kids.
What I do at home is not easy and it is rarely understood by the world, but I know I am doing what is right for our family. I believe that I am a good mom. After all, who knows my kids and their needs better than me?
And, when they are grown up and gone I will have all the time in the world to do whatever else I wish. But for now, this is where I will stay. And I won’t give up. Not during the frustrated tantrums, the blow-out diapers, the willful defiance, the sibling rivalry or the times when all I want is a moment of peace. Because there is nothing more joyous than hearing my two year-old whisper in my ear for the first time, “I hove you, mama.” Or see the love and adoration in my five year-old’s face when I tell her that, yes, I will play with her. Or feel the warm, tight hug of my growing seven year-old, who, despite how big she is getting, still loves to be held by her mama.
All the special moments, the immeasurable, priceless memories and the pride that comes from raising my babies is worth the tough days.
It’s worth the judgmental looks and disparaging remarks from those who are convinced that what I’m doing isn’t worth it. But I don’t have to justify it to the world. I know that this is kingdom work with eternal rewards and I won’t give up. I hope you won’t give up, either, mama!
Wynter is wife to Jonathan and mama to Chloe, Adaya and Liam. She is a writer, artist, a former marcomm editor, and an avid gardener, TV lover and chocolate-covered cherries addict. In 2012, she self-published her first book, The Secret Inside Me, a memoir about an unplanned pregnancy and her journey to choosing adoption. She founded the Made to Mother Project in 2013 to encourage, support and inspire women by sharing their diverse stories of motherhood.
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This post may be linked up here: A Proverbs 31 Wife, The Purposeful Mom, Nap Time Creations, Cornerstone Confessions, Golden Reflections Blog, Time Warp Wife. A Bowl Full of Lemons, Raising Homemakers, We Are That Family, My Love for Words, Living Well Spending Less, Creative Geekery, Essential Thing Devotions, Sarah Titus, Snippets of Inspiration, Happy and Blessed Home, Womanhood With Purpose, I Can Teach My Child, SITS Girls, and MamaGab.
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